maple leaves, Berkeley,CA, point and shoot

What’s on my mind today are the ways in which motherhood has turned me into the person I COULDN’T TOLERATE before now. For starters, I used to be a compulsively early person. I inherited this from my parents who are also compulsively early. Dinnner at 8? They will arrive at 7:30 at the restaurant looking mildly annoyed that you didn’t arrive sooner. Going to the airport? They will arrive FOUR HOURS in advance.

I am also this way, although not to such an extreme. I will wait in the car so as to not arrive too early. I will drive somewhere, park and go window shopping until just before the appointment. Matt has to bargain with me to leave the house later so we aren’t the dorky first guests at the party. (I LOVE being the dorky first guest!)

Not only am I obnoxiously early, but I CAN’T STAND IT when others are late. I am even a little bit smug about it all and regularly go on “I can’t believe they are late AGAIN!” tirades.

Anyway, all of that flew out the window almost exactly one year ago.

I woke up one day and realized that I am now that person I couldn’t stand. I show up late. I cancel at the last minute. I am too busy and forget to call. I fall out of communication. I don’t return emails. I leave the oven on, I let the toast burn, I let lunch burn, I let dinner burn, I forget everything.

I actually stood up my coach for not one but two coaching calls this month. As a coach myself, this is extra mortifying to me. I know what it’s like when a client is late or flakes. I would huff and puff and consider firing them. Don’t they respect me and my time? Aren’t they invested in this coaching process? How hard is it to pick up the phone at a designated time?!! This is why their life isn’t working! I would think.

Did I mention that I am now that person?
Oh my.

I know this lesson is not over.

I know I will eventually have the opportunity to become (if only for a moment) everything I can’t tolerate in others. I will be the mom yelling at her kids in the grocery aisle. I will be the crazy girl you can’t get away from at the party. I will be the annoying relative. I will be the a-hole on the cell phone at the restaurant. I will be all these things and more.

I believe there is a point to all of this. Something about compassion. Until we can be with our own imperfections and our own failures we won’t be able to be with others’. We have all of it in us; the meanie, the judge, the negative nelly, the martyr, the jealous friend… I want to be able to be with all of those parts…not to make them wrong but to notice them, and teach Ben that to be human is to be beautifully imperfect.

I was talking with SARK about all of this and she remembered this incredibly fitting quote: “Until we have become that which we are demonstrating against, we will have made no progress.” -Thich Nhat Hanh

I suppose I am making progress.

Follow on Facebook Follow on Instagram Follow on Twitter Follow on Pinterest

Hi, I’m Andrea

On this blog you’ll be learning with me how to use our voices, share our creative superpowers and live life in full color.

As an artist, photographer, life coach + mentor, I’m redefining what it means to be a SUPERHERO — ‘cause in my world, it’s got nothing to do with capes, spandex or sidekicks and everything to do with tenderness, intuition & baby steps of bravery.


1 Comment

  1. oprol evorter

    Hello, Neat post. There is a problem together with your website in internet explorer, might check this… IE still is the marketplace leader and a good section of folks will pass over your excellent writing because of this problem.


Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Ready for your next creative adventure?

Download the Mondo Beyondo dream generator!

Latest from the blog

CSP #82: We Should Get Together with Kat Vellos

CSP #82: We Should Get Together with Kat Vellos

Listen in to this great conversation about adult friendship with expert Kat Vellos! Kat Vellos is a trusted expert on the power of cultivating meaningful friendships. She’s a speaker and author of the book, We Should Get Together: The Secret to Cultivating Better...

read more

self guided e-courses

Choosing Ease

30 days of ease, joy and cultivating wonder

I believe that when I’m creating from a place of ease and buoyancy I am actually in flow – in alignment with myself and the Universe.

Capture the Magic

Rock your camera-phone - and discover that beauty and joy are everywhere.

The very best camera is the one that’s with you! I’ll show you how to get on your own path of joy and delight while learning photography skills along the way.

mondo beyondo

What does your heart truly want in 2020? 

What if you could name your dreams and desires for 2020 and create a plan to make them reality?


Get your FREE guide to experiencing more wonder + joy!

Hop on my mailing list to get weekly-ish inspiration, updates and your free downloadable PDF: 9 ways to experience more wonder right now. I'm so glad you're here!

You have Successfully Subscribed!