Our little LA fiasco! 😫

Remember that bacon-wrapped hot dog?


If you read my last newsletter, you might know that my son got food poisoning from a bacon-wrapped hot dog from a street vendor. (I know, sketchy!) But when I started the same uncontrollable purging a couple of days later, we knew we were in trouble (and that it wasn’t food poisoning) And yes, EVERYONE went down like dominoes. One by one. I was so grateful when Jesse was still able to take the boys to Universal Studios (their Hannukkah present) while I was the walking dead back at the hotel room.

I could tell you about how this was our first attempt at a blended family vacation – his kiddo and mine all together for some Los Angeles fun! And there was some fun… it just looked a lot different than what we expected.

But here’s what I really want to tell you. 

As I was hanging my head over the toilet in utter misery, there was a moment when I couldn’t throw up but knew that if I did I would feel better. I found myself saying aloud to the empty bathroom – I AM WILLING. And almost instantly, I threw up.

I used this tactic over and over as I got through the grueling hours of this illness. Every time I declared- I am willing – my body would let go.

I think what I was trying to say to myself was –

I am willing to feel this pain.

I am willing to have this experience.

I am willing to let go.

I had to jump on a plane for Mexico yesterday and with each new bout of nausea and pain, I would say to myself, I am willing to feel this. And then I would watch. Not run away, but move toward it in my mind’s eye. Sometimes I felt it more acutely. Other times the pain would go away.

And now, I am wondering – What else could I allow to move through me if I was willing to feel it?

Would the loneliness I sometimes feel move through me more gracefully if (instead of pushing it away by distracting myself, numbing, getting busy) I said to myself – I am willing to feel this loneliness. And then actually feel it. All the way to the end.

Because the good news is that it does have an end. Most emotions only last about 90 seconds they say!

What about those other emotions we push away? What if I said to myself, I am willing to feel this pain in my belly, this tightness in my chest, this ache in my heart, this grief, this loss…

When I told Laurie this she said, “When you surrender to what is happening, there is less struggle, less fight. You step into the flow. Ironically, everything is easier.”

As I’ve entered into a new love relationship this year, I’ve had to be willing to feel the vulnerability that allows for intimacy and closeness. I’ve needed to feel the fear that comes with opening your heart to another. I’ve had to be willing to risk having my heart broken to receive all the goodness and love that’s right in front of me.

What are you willing to feel my friends?

Maybe you are willing to feel rejection as you enter the dating world again.
Maybe you are willing to be messy when you communicate that hard thing to a friend.
Maybe you are willing to feel afraid as you step into a new dream this year.

Life can more easily flow through us when we are willing.
There is an ease in this. A flow.
Let’s not resist what’s here anyway.
Just 90 seconds loves. Just 90 seconds.

Follow on Facebook Follow on Instagram Follow on Twitter Follow on Pinterest

Hi, I’m Andrea

On this blog you’ll be learning with me how to use our voices, share our creative superpowers and live life in full color.

As an artist, photographer, life coach + mentor, I’m redefining what it means to be a SUPERHERO — ‘cause in my world, it’s got nothing to do with capes, spandex or sidekicks and everything to do with tenderness, intuition & baby steps of bravery.



Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Ready for your next creative adventure?

Download the Mondo Beyondo dream generator!

Latest from the blog

CSP #82: We Should Get Together with Kat Vellos

CSP #82: We Should Get Together with Kat Vellos

Listen in to this great conversation about adult friendship with expert Kat Vellos! Kat Vellos is a trusted expert on the power of cultivating meaningful friendships. She’s a speaker and author of the book, We Should Get Together: The Secret to Cultivating Better...

read more

self guided e-courses

Choosing Ease

30 days of ease, joy and cultivating wonder

I believe that when I’m creating from a place of ease and buoyancy I am actually in flow – in alignment with myself and the Universe.

Capture the Magic

Rock your camera-phone - and discover that beauty and joy are everywhere.

The very best camera is the one that’s with you! I’ll show you how to get on your own path of joy and delight while learning photography skills along the way.

mondo beyondo

What does your heart truly want in 2020? 

What if you could name your dreams and desires for 2020 and create a plan to make them reality?


Get your FREE guide to experiencing more wonder + joy!

Hop on my mailing list to get weekly-ish inspiration, updates and your free downloadable PDF: 9 ways to experience more wonder right now. I'm so glad you're here!

You have Successfully Subscribed!